There’s this idea that pregnant women need to keep their news under wraps during the earliest weeks — some say they can start spilling the beans at 12 weeks, others use the 14-week-mark (aka the start of the second trimester) as the benchmark. Our take? You should reveal your pregnancy whenever it feels like the right time for you, whether that’s five minutes after you see that positive test or post-birth a la Kylie Jenner.
But while your personal preference may be to remain tight-lipped for a while, it’s also important to remember that, for the sake of your safety (or even just your sanity!), certain people should be made aware if you’re expecting.
The people who fall under these categories should definitely know about your pregnancy, even if you’re not ready to shout it from the rooftops quite yet.
All doctors you visit
Obviously, your OB-GYN is going to know you’re pregnant — that’s a no-brainer, right? It’s important to remember, though, that every healthcare practitioner you happen to visit should be aware of your pregnancy. Whether that’s a dermatologist, a dentist, a physical therapist…the list just keeps going. In most cases, a healthcare provider will ask if there’s a chance you could be expecting, but it’s always a good idea to make him or her aware of this up front. That way, you know any treatments or tests performed on you will be safe for you and your baby.
If you’re seeing a mental health therapist, he or she should be made aware of your pregnancy. He or she can then keep an eye out for pregnancy-linked mental health issues that may come up and need to be addressed. The best part? Telling your therapist is an excellent way to discuss your news without fear of it getting out before you’re ready (let’s hear it for patient confidentiality!).
Your personal trainer/fitness instructor
Whether you’re working out one-on-one with a personal trainer or taking a group fitness class, the person who is overseeing your workout should definitely be informed that you’re expecting. That may require heading to class a few minutes early so you can chat with the instructor, but it’s a worthwhile move. That way, your instructor or trainer knows to show you modifications wherever necessary, adjust your form if you’re at risk of hurting yourself, and allow you as many breaks as you need through the workout. If he or she knows you’re grabbing water more often than you normally would because you need it (and not just because you’re slacking off), it may help you avoid an awkward mid-class call-out.
More often than not when you’re eating a meal at a restaurant, your waiter will stop by and ask if you have any dietary restrictions. Even if you’re allergy-free and not sticking to a specific diet, you should take this opportunity to inform him or her that you’re pregnant. That way, the kitchen can take special care to ensure everything you order is fully cooked through, pasteurized and modified to suit pregnancy safety standards. If you’re out with friends who don’t yet know you’re expecting, simply excuse yourself and talk to your waitress while you’re on your way “to the bathroom.”
Granted, this one falls into a definite gray area — your boss may not need to know, but confiding in him or her may make it a bit easier for you to navigate the symptoms and constant doctor’s appointments of early pregnancy. Cluing your boss in is especially important if you do work that involves heavy lifting or anything else that may be physically unsafe while you’re expecting. For those of us who work desk jobs, alerting your boss can help you explain why you might be a little extra tired throughout the workday. Ultimately, you have to decide if you want to share this news with your boss, but there are definite benefits to doing so.
Your go-to female confidant
Again, this one is definitely not mandatory, and if you don’t want to tell anyone outside of your partner, that’s your prerogative. But, hear us out: Confiding in a female friend (and yes, your mom and sister both count in this category) could be a game-changer as you work through the physical and mental stress of pregnancy. Someone who has experienced it all before can guide you through the process (and answer all the “is this normal?” inquiries that don’t require a call to your doctor). Choose someone you trust, who has your back, and who will gladly lounge on the couch with you when you’re too exhausted to do much else. Trust us, you’ll be thankful for the girl-to-girl support!