“Dearest Kamilla baby,
I am not with you on our first ever Mother’s Day. It’s absolutely my fault; I booked this time-sensitive business trip so that I could oversee the final development of my next collection and work on this new idea for the business. Honestly, I didn’t even think about this holiday when booking my trip. And I think I simply forgot because I’ve never celebrated it before.
As sad as I am for myself, I am leaving with a purpose. I’ve always worked hard, but now I am working the hardest ever so that you will be so proud of your mama. I never had time for anything before – and suddenly I have time for anything related to you – even though I’m busier than ever. As stressful having a business is, I wouldn’t change a thing as it’s allowed you and me to flourish. Like the fact that we don’t need a nanny and that I get to spend many 9-5 weekdays in your company – as you play and I close deals (a special thank-you to the best Daddy in the world and the Grandmothers who step up and who I trust with all my might).
I won’t lie, I am truly sad. But you should know that I celebrate you every day with the same enthusiasm. I’ve fallen so madly in love with you, it’s really not definable or comparable.
I’ve made countless crockpots from scratch of biodynamic (aka better than organic) baby food but I’ve also taken 8 inevitable business trips and have released 3 collections in the first 6 months of your existence – the first just a month after you were born. Usha Dadi (Monica Maasi’s mom) gave me great words of solace – that with these trips I was teaching you the spirit of independence and it was molding you to be a strong woman – like all those around you.
I see your spirit. It is already courageous, bold, relentless, full of wisdom, so positive and beyond a miracle. I’ve forgotten the torturous 10 long months of having you in me – the 77 pounds I gained (goodbye Lou Malnati’s, hello Equinox). Life with you is so colorful, much like this new Resort collection I’m working on.
The center of our universe is you. I can’t wait to share more of our faith and culture with you but most importantly, to teach you the lessons I am learning in the hopes that they empower you, help you rise.
You’ve redefined what my journey is. Your happiness is WAY more important than any business decision I’ve made. So I hope you understand, because I’m sure there will be more holidays that I will mess up in the spirit of deadlines, commitments and deliverables.
But I know that I can be a great mom and have a thriving business. And that we can indeed have it all, my love. And together, we will.
Love, your mama
As told to M+A from Fashion Designer Azeeza Khan